My surprise.

I walked into my home last weekend to find a bag of dirty laundry and I couldn't process it. I had spent the day volunteering with homeless veterans, something I've done now for 5 or 6 years, and I was emotionally spent. I looked at them differently this year wondering how they were forgotten. How was it they sacrificed so much, endured so much, and now had nothing. I wondered who in their life loved them? I prayed for my own son, as I usually do, that he isn't left broken and battered and unable to function outside of the military. I came home expecting to see my two sons and my husband but I didn't expect this. I looked at the laundry and wondered who would have left that there. Such an odd place right by the door. And who would have taken my sailor's shoes out of his closet and put them here too? It felt like minutes that I stood there wondering this. Never imagining for one minute it belonged to Ryan!! Then it clicked...he was HOME! I cried not because I was sad but because I was whole. I had all the people I loved under one roof! What a gift! He had kept his homecoming a secret. How I'll never know but it took a village!!! So many people knew and kept it from me. What a treat! He was here only for one night which was of course not enough. I spent my time washing his laundry. I guess thats what mothers do when kids come home. Cook and do laundry. I drove him back and cried again dropping him off. I'm still not used to handing him back over.

Yesterday I got to attend his BESS submarine school graduation. God has blessed me by being close to his base. Its 2.5 hours away and I can actually find it by myself! After his graduation he surprised me once again and told me he was coming home with us. This being Columbus Day weekend he has four days off. He has to go back for Saturday watch but will come back on Sunday. I like having him home. I know that January will come all too soon and he'll be assigned a submarine somewhere. I know I only have a one in six chance that it will be CT. He very well could be stationed in Guam...I don't even know if I could find it on a map and I do know it's too far to be a quick car trip! So for now, I have him here. I'll live in the now and pray for the tomorrows to come. I'll cherish the laundry.